Stars

Sometimes I feel like exploding,
my heart in a million shards, like a super nova
the elements so richly dense that they wish to
fall like snowflakes on weary eyes, granting hope and peace of mind
on all who cannot see stars in the dull of city lights.

The stardust glows like fireflies, lighting up a million eyes
saying, “there is more, there is hope, don’t give up.”
The elements that compose me tell of a place so heavenly, no human tower can reach and no human striving can touch such a glory.

“I want more,” says the human heart.

...to tell a story so rich, I cannot contain myself!

Explorations

I feel so small in such a big city
It is daunting, but people are friendly
I met a graphic designer for the Dublin paper,
and we had a good conversation about sports and literature, famous Irish people, and the eye opening benefits if travel.
It was enjoyable wandering around the city.
It is like a more lively and cleaner version of San Fransisco,
The Old town architecture with touches of Greece, is a wonderful sight.
I got lucky and stumbled upon a Dublin Starbucks
Extra foamy soy Chai was a warm taste of home=)

I walked a few kilometers to Christ' Church Cathedral...
it is breathtakingly beautiful~almost unreal.
The huge wooden doors I have to push open with two hands,
the stained glass windows that look down at me like a prism,
the choir rehearsing 4 part harmony to what sounded like Mozart,
resonating through the space.
The organist was young and lively and fun to watch,
he enjoyed making such powerful sounds pipe into the air.

There was something old and distant about the space,
and then something Holy and magnificient,
like a ring of angels descending with the sound.

The words echo in my mind,
"I am now finished with my hermitage"
It was needed for the past 5 weeks,
The silence necessary for the whispers of God to get a little louder.
I treasure those moments.
And now, on a fresh page,
I want to embrace all of my friends at once!
I look forward to seeing all you friends and family when I return!

I found a little hole in the wall bookstore, (I just love those!)
and grabbed Hebrew poetry and Frost and Dickenson and Stardust,
and plopped on the floor in the corner for....hours, marvelous!

My appetite for adventure is satisfied for one day,  Mmmm.

A New Vision

These are some random thoughts, disjointed puzzle pieces that are important to me. I hope you can find pieces that resonate with you as well~

As an old season sheds its skins,
a new one begins
I let go of the old that covered me
allowing freshness to grace a new season

I needed to be blind in order to see
given internal eyes for the path in front of me
and the people around me

I could not see with my human eyes
these stars converging in intricate constellations
I couldn't see the webs converging to these vertices
The Dickens novel unfolds with a fresh understanding

The words of truth are sweeter than morning dew,
"Exalt your self and you will be humbled.
Humble yourself, and you will be exalted"

Heart cares for those characters intertwined
with my life, and those that I do not yet know.
Yearning for the capacity for more "charity" 1 Corinthians 13

Going into the flame with refined desires,
This time not afraid of the fire

In wonder I walk forward
Like I am taking my first breath all over
Like I am opening my eyes for the first time
and yet knowing the words that have long been written
in the fibers of my being
yet needing the proper time for revealing, or the right skin-sheding to be seen.

Sometimes, I can't explain it or give justice to it, but~ Life takes my breath away

~More Than Gold~

As I walk through the rain,
I can't stop the pain
but I try to maintain peace in mind
Trust.
I used to dance to rant
to fume off all the good and bad
now my body, is stripped of strength
but my eyes, have been enabled to cry
Healing.
I feel as though my body is no longer 21 years old,
like I am suddenly 60.
It is a strange exchange,
and in my determination not to worry,
I receive this precious gift;
Compassion.
Yes, I miss running, dancing,
and being full of energy.
But now I receive a quite peace as I
applaud others to shine.
Humility.
It is a peculiar irony
that I am in the place of the most beauty
while enduring the most pain.
It helps me think that glory is what is being reaped.
Hope;
does not dissapoint us.
When the pressure became nearly too much to bear,
my prayer was heard, not healed, but heard.
I was given a gift unexpected,
A pearl of ardor, hope, passion, and vision.
Thankfulness.
for, it is out of Love that we are disciplined.
And it is discipline that allows us to love more.

Sometimes we must be humbled, stretched, and refined before we can receive the incredible blessings that await us. So while I stand in my weakness and even when I am healed, I will hold on to Trust, Healing, Compassion, Humility, Hope, Thankfulness, and Love; for these precious qualities are worth more than gold. ~Selah

I Took the Road Less Travelled by...

The road diverged in a green wood,
and sorry I could not travel both
I took the one less travelled by,
seeing it a fair choice indeed;

What I did see, my eyes failed to believe
Magic fills our stories, yes;
yet the fantastic fills such realities as...

The moss that clings to the trees,
embracing them in pillows of green,

The grass is lush and soft to touch,
a rush of blood behind my finger tips,
comfort fills my senses, 

Gusts of wind brush past my ears,
I turn to hear the whispers,
that seem to match the breath in my lungs;
perpetuated by some external heartbeat.

Night falls gently upon the meadow,
and a different sort of music begins to play,

Silence takes center stage...
until her graceful presence calms the creatures of the woods

A Melody trickles into existence,
as he begins to waltz with Silence on the water,

Mezmerized by such melodies,
I too, begin to dream within reality

The creatures peak out from their homes before
they kiss their young, goodnight;

As the forest goes to sleep
The magic of seeing,
the sweetness of hearing divine things overwhelms me;
I dream of what roads less traveled lay before me.

In weakness...

In weakness, He gives me strength.
When I am strong it can be easy to claim it as my own
no, it is moments like these where I see that everything;
the very breath I breathe is a gift.
In this moment, it is so strange
to not have strength to run, and to go through a normal day
I am so utterly weak! all I can do is whisper His name
All I can do is be still.
and as I wait upon Him
He is restoring my soul
the parts that have been lost, stolen, broken, damaged, or given away

Christ' love covers all things
Christ' love forgives all sins
Christ' love heals all things

Broken, I have finally been able to pour out tears
the waterfall could not stand to be dammed any longer
in the past seven days I have cried more than the past seven years combined!
Tears of joy, pain, depth of feeling, movement of the Spirit.
For so long I couldn't release that stream that flows from the heart.

I am weak and I am sick
but I am receiving a different kind of healing
from the inside out.
I give God praise, even in my weakness

  "Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us."  ~Romans 5:3-5

The Sun Was Out Today

The sun was out today
pouring diamonds on the lake
whenever he peeked from behind the clouds

The sun was out today
kissing warmth upon my face
all the while I waited for his shining to come out

The days of rain, the days of pain
where my eyes have tried to compensate,
trading sight for blindness,
and blindness for illumination
of a heart set aflame with insight
that burns brighter than any sense could ever strive for...

The sun was out today
Nourished by the tears of rain
I stretch out my arms wide and embrace
the rays that make me grow

These are a few of my favorite things

Crisp green apples
Walking at waters' edge
Deep conversations with brilliant professors
Moments of awe at the beauty around me
Moss covered trees
The sound of a friends' voice
Warm showers
Long socks
Dreaming with my Maker

...These are a few of my favorite things

When I am feeling weak, when I am feeling sick, when I am feeling sad, I simply remember my favorite things and then I don't feel so bad~ (I came up with that awesome rhyme all by myself haha;)

Be blessed as you enjoy some of your (and my) favorite things~

Gratefulness

I rejoice in my weakness
because it it enables me to receive Christ's strength.
I praise God, even through the pain of a lingering splitting migraine.
I am grateful for the rest I receive in His presence.
I am thankful for the gift of sight, even when it is not working properly.
I am thankful for the ability (when I am able to see clearly) to read books and do homework with ease.
I am thankful for friends and family, even though they are oceans away from me.
I am thankful for the gift or hearing, seeing, feeling, smelling, tasting, touching, moving.
Tis funny how I notice these as gifts and not norms because of times like this.
I am thankful for the clean air of Ireland, the lovely gardens, and the melodies that float to me on the wind~

"Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near." Philippians 4:4-5

Where Worlds Collide

Years of unwept tears welling up inside of me,
torrenting as a hurricane, a violent sea.
When the high pressure with within my body collides with this low, quiet and sweet...peace,
I almost cannot handle it, for the storm erupting within me did not know its strength
in its naturally chaotic environment.
I want to pour out rain for my heart has reached the point of condensation;
microscopic cares coalescing to form drops from the clouds that have been hovering.
I want to release lightning for the energy withing me is exploding, bolting for freedom.
I want to release thunder, to applaud the work of God as He demonstrates that He loves me violently and vehemently.
I find rest in the eye of the storm, knowing here I can see clearly-not around me, but vertically~
gazing into the Eyes of "the one my heart loves,"
For He is setting my heart free.